Only in our house...
Only in our house is someone talking to the dog when they say, "Hey, no tongue!"
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Also Writing as Maria DiRico
Murder is a funny business.
Ellen Byron
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USA TODAY BESTSELLING & AGATHA AWARD-WINNING AUTHOR
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Ellen Byron
Jan 24, 2015
I heart Taylor Swift...
I do. I totally heart her. Because I have the musical taste of a fifteen-year-old girl.
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Ellen Byron
Dec 13, 2014
Anyone...
Anyone who thinks man is innately good has never driven in the rain in Los Angeles. #newnovelacajuncountrymystery
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Ellen Byron
Nov 25, 2014
The couple...
The couple picking recyclables out of our neighbor's trash just drove away in car way nicer than mine. I think I found my next career.
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Ellen Byron
Nov 22, 2014
I heard...
I heard Benedict Cumberbatch say on NPR that his name sounds like a fart in the bathtub. He just got a whole lot sexier to me.
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Ellen Byron
Nov 11, 2014
Somebody...
Somebody needs to tell my mirror and all photographs, "Hey, that's not what I look like in my head."
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Ellen Byron
Oct 29, 2014
I got really excited...
I got really excited about how well new batteries worked in the TV remote. And then I got super-depressed about how excited I got about...
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Ellen Byron
Oct 10, 2014
Irony...
Irony is having the song, "Pumped-Up Kicks" come on the radio as you're driving your kid to school after getting a robocall from the...
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Ellen Byron
Oct 3, 2014
Spotted...
Spotted on the freeway, a guy doing 70 on a motorcycle while checking his iPhone. Because doing 70 on a motorcycle on an L..A. freeway...
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Ellen Byron
Sep 26, 2014
FB...
FB, I'm flattered that your suggested post to me today was for a Mazzerati dealership. I wonder what kind of trade-in deal I'll get on a...
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Ellen Byron
Sep 4, 2014
At the end...
At the end of my physical therapy today, the therapist whispered to me, "Did you know that your shirt is inside-out?" No, I did not....
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Ellen Byron
Aug 28, 2014
At 6:30 a.m....
At 6:30 a.m., the 134 East is a steady flow of sleep-deprived people driving straight into the sun. But I did get to hear that the news...
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